Tuesday, September 16, 2008

so many words to pen down but i can't.

i felt so low, no motivation to a single stuff.
even work today did not went as well.
the coffee taste bad.
food feels bland.

i can't take it anymore.

i think i know and i understand why partly you felt this way.
its all my fault.
if i have not been such a failure in life then things wouldn't change as it is.
you've really sacrifice alot for me. i don't blame you for blaming or hating me.
things just go so fast and yepps, life change and varies alot but mine is too drastic that i think maybe you can't take it for the mean time.

don't know whats got into me.
i actually cried two times. in the office when i'm typing and on the bus.
was still trying to be happy, smiling, singing until i sang the song än jing by Jay.
the lyrics really was like whamp right into my face.

going round just can't get you right out of my mine. worst still whenever i see those cute penguins. i have to force myself the whole day to smile and be myself.
lucky ying yong was with me. at least i can be myself when i'm with him.
i'm sorry baby, i can't be the man you want me to be. i am a failure and nothing else. i can't even comfort you when you're at your lowest. i am simply what you say. mei yo yong. mei yo yong.

the least that i can say which to be honest to myself is that the last 25months have not change. i love you. i've fall to deep to pull myself out from this abyss.

there's much more to say. but this feelings can't be pen down. i just felt really really bad, confuse.

.....

.....

i'm sorry baby shan.



with everlasting love,
Andy - mei yo yong